“EEK!”

“What?”

Aunt Mercilus pointed her finger at the corner of my room.  Each week she found a squibble from one meal or other, and had to parade the forces of flocculence before me.

“That thing with fuzz all over—I think it is moving.” She screeched.

“No Aunt Merr, it isn’t moving.”

“I’m telling you it is Young Man.  Do not contradict your elders.”

Why is it that the whole world knows me by Dirk Le Feur, but my aunt has to call me Young Man?  I sighed and looked at the strange looking worm in the corner.  It was busy furrowing a nest between the dust bunnies and my old green sock.

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Hello!  I’m Miss Fuzz Buzz from Fashion Yak, and I’m here with the fashion designers, Zebu, Zobu, & Yak, who put together this glorious outfit worn by the wonderful actress, Zewie Boneez, in the story, “Of Nests and Bunnies.”    Read this closer description of the outfit worn by Ms. Boneez.  Note the dewlap affect of the layered aprons and the pendulous strings.  Smell the Yakhair woven into the hem of the housedress.  Can’t you just imagine swaying in the fields with this outfit on?

Now, Back to your regularly typed dialog.

Press button.

“Oh look, Aunt Merr, it’s making a cocoon.  Maybe it will be a butterfly!  I’m making a home for a butterfly—isn’t that sweet?”

“Egads, Young Man.  Sweet indeed.  I promised your mother I’d bring you up clean and proper and you repay me with yeast, mold, and fuzz in your walls.

“It isn’t that bad.”

“Not that bad?  Young Man, in the past month you grew enough antibiotics to kill most germs in third world countries.”

“In a few months and I’ll cure anthrax too.”

“That isn’t the point.  You need to prevent disease, not cure it.”

“Tell that to my green sock.”

“Why? What does your sock have say about anything?”

“Last time I put that thing in the wash the machine grew legs and ran away.  They found it in the Yangas of Tibet.”

“Do you mean that washing machine mentioned in the National Enquirer with that big headline:

"MACHINE GROWS LEGS—VOWS TO AVOID SOCKS?”

 “You can see why I don’t wash my socks.  How about I throw the sock at the anthrax?”

 “That’s disgusting, and this is what you will do Young Man:  You will clean this mess today.  Today!  Understand? Or I will never speak to you again.”

 “Oh Aunt Merr, I’m hurt now.  Look, I think you made Fuzzy mad.  He wants to stay.”

 “I’m not staying.  My poor little heart can’t take any more of this.  I think my eucalyptic nariosis is acting up again with all those spores crawling on your floor.”

 “See you next week Aunt Merr.  Say goodbye Fuzzy, Dust, Bunny, Sock.”

You never know who we will chase away next.  What’s on the tube?

Descend now the curtain, and relinquish thine words to the white of space.

Cue headspace: Are you feeling ok?

White space:  Sure, why?

Headspace:  You have a blank look.

Contest NONentry © 2002